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Thursday, April 5, 2012

RANTY-TANTY

Because some days you just feel like all the Zen you've accumulated throughout your life is mocking you and your self-control has crawled into a deep, dark, dank hole, never to return. I'm not even going to bother framing this in any kind of narrative, because it will suffer. Bullet point rage is the name of the game.

Consider yourself given a great big fuck you if you fall under any of the following categories:

  • People who own cats and don't deflea, neuter, or spay them.
  • People who don't care about the environment as indicated by the Mcdonalds garbage dumped in the middle of the road.
  • People who eat Mcdonalds, KFC, Burger King, Pizza Hutt and a host of others on a regular basis, thereby supporting multinationals and facilitating cruelty to animals, the ecological destruction of the planet, and putting small business owners out of work.
  • Drunk, annoying men.
  • Drunk, annoying women.
  • Annoying children.
  • People who don't read to their children.
  • You think the entire neighborhood wants to listen to your shitty, bass-heavy music.
  • People who burn their wives on deserted New Zealand roads.
  • People who go into schools/universities and shoot students.
  • People who force their religion on others.
  • Schoolyard bullies.
  • People who reject their kids because they are gay.
  • Rick Santorum.
  • Schoolyard bullies. I already said that? It's worth saying again.
  • People who advise others not to study Humanities degrees.
  • People who ignore the world around them and refuse to see the reality they live in.
  • People, mostly. Very few exceptions.

I'm sure I'll come up with more.

1 comment:

Paul Mannering said...

* People who ignore warnings not to read something that they may be offended by - and then read it and get all up in your grill because it offended them.

* People who haven't learned the new give-way rules and hold up traffic when they have right of way

* The belief that because 5% of the population is earning $200K or more a year prices of everything must be based on their budget.

* Sodding CAPTCHA words that make no freaking seanse and are illegible.